ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Randomize
