I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
