well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
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There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
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We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
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