I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize