D3 body, D1 cock
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ladies don't puke and tell
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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