More tranny stories later!
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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