I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize