so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
