These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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