Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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