I just cut my nipple shaving
i barfeds in our rink
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
