Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
