I like to think it a success when the cops are called
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
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