You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Randomize
