I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Randomize
