then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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