maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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