I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I just forgot I was standing up.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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