doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize
