Little spoons don't ask big questions
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
my poor anus
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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