And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize
