i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
