quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
