I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
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