Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
