Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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