I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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