I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
She's not a foreskin expert like you
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
