A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
