Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize