thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
