I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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