i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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