wakey wakey hands off snakey
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
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