To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Randomize
