Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
