i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Randomize
