He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
