so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
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I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
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I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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