Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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