I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
