Already got asked if we're dating
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
