so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
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