Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
How external is "for external use only"?
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
