So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
