evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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