My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
