we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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