I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
