but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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